Mr. Awareness

in which I am visited by unwanted humility

Martial arts skill is a serious pursuit and as I’m sure many readers have found, it is not easy to obtain. In fact, the desire for it can actually become a barrier to its attainment because of the inner tension that can sometimes be created. “Am I skillful now…..not yet?…how about now?” Often this can lead to trying too hard and stumbling as a result. In my case, this stumble was literal.

Once in a while, I was reminded of the folly of taking myself too seriously. While cultivating a serious practice is important, sometimes I got a bit too caught up in “being a practitioner”.

Several years ago, while I was a relatively new student, I was occasionally caught up in my own sense of the importance of what I was doing. I took myself very seriously, thinking, “Look at me, I’m doing something unique and special.”

One day, I was standing on the sidewalk at a busy intersection, waiting for the green light. I decided to expand my hearing and vision to see how much I could take in. Being aware of the situation around one is an important skill, so I used this moment of waiting for the light to change to “practice awareness.” This involves noticing as many sounds as possible, attempting to broaden one’s feeling of the immediate surrounding space, and expanding peripheral vision.

I stood there feeling very “aware” as the mind became very quiet by allowing the senses to expand. The light turned green, and I stepped forward, still reveling in my widened senses and “being unique and special.” I completely forgot I had been standing on a raised curb so I stepped into an empty space. I’ll leave the next moment to your imagination!

As I got back up from having fallen in a heap in the street, I thought, “Nothing like reality to wake Mr. Awareness up!” and started to laugh! This was like a slapstick comedy, made all the more funny by taking myself so seriously.

I learned a lot at that moment. No doubt you can figure out the lessons. You might consider allowing for your own foolishness if it teaches you something and helps you progress in your chosen internal art.

If you’ve taken pity on Mr. Awareness, how about clicking here to buy me a coffee! 😁